The Warmth I Crave,

Does one ever really know how one will respond to a certain situation? Can we ever really know how we will respond in those very moments? I believe for the most part no, we can not know. Of course the outcome can take a certain direction based on your foundation. How you react in times of uncertainty can be influenced from the daily skills we choose to build. Active engagement in one’s own life is essential. I find most just ride on through, rather than be an active participant. I was one such person. Til recently that is.

As we begin this new season of our lives I feel the ache from change. The struggle I am being forced to go through leaves me breathless. I feel like I am still trying to catch up from the last bit. Alas, this is life. The way we all must take in order to be counted among the living. Life is incredibly difficult but also very beautiful.

This is the third time I will have to live away from you physically since we wed. I know that this will be a time of growth and discovery. However, I dread it. Honestly I don’t want this to be the best choice for us. And yet I understand the value it holds for you, me, and for us as a couple. It just seems like such a lonely option. I will be so alone.

What the future holds is uncertain for everyone. Tomorrow is never promised. Prosperity is never a guarantee. We must choose to look at life with hope. To smile each day. To love each other eternally. Through all the pain and suffering we have walked through, we must choose to be better. To be joyful, in spite of the darkness. Be a light to the world.

I love you.